Ok this is me in dancers pose. I love yoga.
It takes such patience and strength and best of all it makes you feel beautiful.
It takes such patience and strength and best of all it makes you feel beautiful.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
The Fatherheart of God
About a year ago on thanksgiving when my family and I sat around in our grandparents house for our annual communion together, which my dad leads, we were going around in the circle taking turns expressing what we were most thankful for in that year. Some amazing things were happening and being said.... my sister in law was pregnant, my brother was home safely from Afghanistan, a few others were growing closer to the lord and there was just this overall sense of love and extreme thankfulness for our lives. As the chance to speak was drawing to a close I felt a rush of adrenalin in my body and I knew I wanted to say something but I was so nervous. Well I did it anyway. I wanted so badly to let my mom and dad know something that has been a long time coming.
Before I tell you what that was I feel a little background is needed here. I have not been the perfect child... some say I have my dads heart and his need to push the line. These can be a dangerous mix for wearing my heart on my sleeve and dating edgy people is not always a perfect formula. Needless to say the Lord brought me through that stage in my life and I am still healing from it today.
Now back to what I said to my parents.... I broke into tears (and for those who know me this is not uncommon) and I told my dad he was my rock and my mom was my heart. Now to most people this probably sounds sweet and no big deal but to me there was so much behind those words. Being my rock means my solid, constant, the one who never fails me and is my strength when mine is not so existent. Being my heart means having a nurturing, loving and compassionate acceptance for who I am and forever and always will be there to hold me through my pain. I couldn't have expressed it so perfectly. God has blessed me with the most amazing parents who have swooped in and helped bring me through some of the most heartbreaking situations and my mom comforted me while my dad held my hand and was my strength. For this I will forever and always be grateful.
This makes me really need to say one more thing. Not everybody has parents who can swoop in and aid them in there time of need. This is where I want to make one thing clear.... This was not my parents alone. In fact they were placed in my life to send a message to me from my Father in heaven who is my rock and my heart. And with or without my parents the Lord God would have found a way to get that message to me because He is the true Father of our lives and for this I am extremely thankful. There is nothing that brings somebody through brokenness like true love. Knowing that no matter the obstacles or road barriers my Father God loves me enough to cross a room to talk to me and tell me He loves me, a sinner, and let me know there is nothing I have done that he can not repair. You know how this makes me feel.... like a 5 year old little girl dressed in a little white sun dress, completely innocent and pure, running and jumping in my fathers lap where he proceeds to give me the best hug I have ever had. And again I feel safe.
Before I tell you what that was I feel a little background is needed here. I have not been the perfect child... some say I have my dads heart and his need to push the line. These can be a dangerous mix for wearing my heart on my sleeve and dating edgy people is not always a perfect formula. Needless to say the Lord brought me through that stage in my life and I am still healing from it today.
Now back to what I said to my parents.... I broke into tears (and for those who know me this is not uncommon) and I told my dad he was my rock and my mom was my heart. Now to most people this probably sounds sweet and no big deal but to me there was so much behind those words. Being my rock means my solid, constant, the one who never fails me and is my strength when mine is not so existent. Being my heart means having a nurturing, loving and compassionate acceptance for who I am and forever and always will be there to hold me through my pain. I couldn't have expressed it so perfectly. God has blessed me with the most amazing parents who have swooped in and helped bring me through some of the most heartbreaking situations and my mom comforted me while my dad held my hand and was my strength. For this I will forever and always be grateful.
This makes me really need to say one more thing. Not everybody has parents who can swoop in and aid them in there time of need. This is where I want to make one thing clear.... This was not my parents alone. In fact they were placed in my life to send a message to me from my Father in heaven who is my rock and my heart. And with or without my parents the Lord God would have found a way to get that message to me because He is the true Father of our lives and for this I am extremely thankful. There is nothing that brings somebody through brokenness like true love. Knowing that no matter the obstacles or road barriers my Father God loves me enough to cross a room to talk to me and tell me He loves me, a sinner, and let me know there is nothing I have done that he can not repair. You know how this makes me feel.... like a 5 year old little girl dressed in a little white sun dress, completely innocent and pure, running and jumping in my fathers lap where he proceeds to give me the best hug I have ever had. And again I feel safe.
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